This coach has paid good money for her training. Now it is six months on from that triumphant moment when she learnt that she had got her qualification. She knew it would take time to build a thriving practice but it’s still not happening. Disappointment dominates her thinking. She has just asked me to be … Read the rest >>
Category: Being a Coach
What happens when a coach gets stuck?
In this instance, I am the client. I am desperate for help to manage chronic pain. Pain is the special subject of my coach. I have explained to her that I am sceptical about how far mind-based approaches will work and that I am already familiar with many of the techniques.
Unfortunately, this coaching went … Read the rest >>
The vulnerable coach
It’s a first supervision session for this coach and I’m exploring how her early life shaped her adult beliefs and behaviour. She looks dubious. ‘I had a perfectly happy childhood’, she says, hesitating a little. ‘Except we did have to tiptoe around my Dad sometimes’
‘Tell me about that.’
‘He was in a senior role … Read the rest >>
Connect: Building Exceptional Relationships with Family, Friends and Colleagues
David Bradford and Carole Robin, Penguin Life, 2021
It’s amazing how often the trail of what is good and lasting in social psychology leads back to the great Kurt Lewin (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurt_Lewin.) If you want proof of why leadership style influences performance, look to his classic action research with boys’ groups in the 1940s, … Read the rest >>
More honesty about coaching, please!
When the first lockdown was really biting in 2020, I was part of a coaches’ Zoom get-together. The overarching question was how the pandemic was affecting our income. Some coaches spoke despairingly about the way their training and facilitation work had vanished overnight. Many described the disappearance of most of their clients. Yet there were … Read the rest >>
When is it ok to talk about yourself in coaching?
A thoughtful participant on our recent coach training course at the Guildhall School of Music and Drama raised this issue.
‘It feels as if sometimes it might be useful to say to a client that something similar has happened to me. But is it?’ In ordinary life we do create rapport with friends and … Read the rest >>
Six ways a ‘chemistry’ coaching conversation can go wrong
In a world where the supply of coaches exceeds the demand, the so-called ‘chemistry’ conversation is ever more important. Some organizations may even insist that their potential coachees meet or interview at least two coaches. But it’s so easy for this conversation to take a wrong turn. In my work as a supervisor I hear … Read the rest >>
How to deal with unwanted advice about cancer
Every now and then clients ask me for help on how to deal with intrusive comments about their health, or the health of a close family member. Typically the scenario is a very recent diagnosis of cancer. This is what works for people with cancer or other unpleasant conditions which invite unwanted sympathy and advice:… Read the rest >>
Can coaches ‘make’ clients change?
When I opened the email – and I had certainly never heard of the sender – I saw that it promised me something amazing. If I signed up to a particular training course, I could learn ten questions which would guarantee that my clients would change! Really, truly, they would not be able to help … Read the rest >>
Coach panic: ‘Don’t Know What To Say!’
My good friend and colleague Jane Cook of Linden Learning (www.lindenlearning.org) raises the question of how to prepare inexperienced and trainee coaches for life after our courses. She reminds me that on the courses we run together, one of the most frequent dreads expressed by our participants is of being struck dumb with their real … Read the rest >>
The Two Rules of Persuasion Every Coach knows but Remain didn’t
Sometimes we humans are remarkably simple-minded. It should be the easiest-peasiest thing in the world for politicians and media and evil-minded individuals to influence us, as well as the virtuous and high-minded who want us to change behaviour for our own good. When you work as a coach you draw on these principles every day.… Read the rest >>
8 Myths and Half Truths about Creating a Coaching Business
We go into coaching because we love it. We have experienced the power it has and are eager to work with our clients so that they can experience it too. One guesstimate is that there could be as many as 15,000 independent coaches in the UK. How many of those are making a decent living … Read the rest >>